Nutty B Confession 2: Irony is the Best Work Companion

Working at this cart for the past few years has given me a startling realization. Irony is my only constant friend. I stay this because I have one major confession to make: the product I sell with such vigor would kill me. I am deathly allergic to all nuts and nut products. Have been for years. So anytime a prospective customer asks me “Which is your favorite?” I usually laugh it off and say “It’s a subjective question.” And mention that it depends on personal tastes. The unwashed masses are fine with this answer. But some do press the question to which I reveal my horrible secret. The truth to the question is “They all taste like a slow painful death at the hands of anaphylactic shock to me.” The then response is typically concern. Most wonder how I do it. Then they buy something and I continue my day. Irony also appears when I sample and the response back is that the individual is allergic, to which I reply “Me, too.” Mostly because I find the food allergic community of the day takes themselves entirely too seriously. Sure, having food allergies is serious and should stand to bring us together and not provide a pretentious podium for entitled people to stand on. The reaction from those also in the allergic community is less than sympathetic. Why in the world would anyone willingly work in a place that in fact can and most likely will kill them?
The beauty of it is in the fact that I have very little actual interaction with the product. Between bagging and selling I don’t really touch anything. So even though the risk is always present I feel fairly safe. I do have irony on my side. He won’t let me die. Yet.


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I'm just your everyday human person with a keen eye for what's really happening. Be prepared for wit, humor and Dr. Who references. Loves include anime, writing, eating sweets, art and visits to the park to feed the ducks.

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